Jack Vanatis Plans

Plan: Car Dealership
Fellowship 3 allows a vast number of plans to come into effect. First off, it allows Skafoi 1 vehicles to be made without binding any mania. Building MANY cars out of scrap metal, with massive minuses to top speed multiplier, will allow for a car that, while still faster than pretty much anything on the road, is not obviously 'supernaturally' fast, and by transforming the massive bonuses from speed reduction into reduced mania cost (for a minus one) and a large number of resilience instances, I gain free cars that are better than anything currently on the market. Runs on its own residual power, goes as fast as any other car, handles as well as them, and has 28 dice to resist havoc. Scientific investigation of the workings brings that down to 25 for an average (not accounting for re-rolls) of 7.5 successes per havoc check.

Yeaaaaaaah.

Plan: SCIE(NCE)
The Scientific Channel for Intelligent Entertainment (New Content Everyday). Genius produced entertainment.

"Warbeak Talks", "DeathRace", and "Sewer Hero" in the starting lineup. Warbeak be's adorable and talks about whatever gets into her head in Warbeak Talks. DeathRace features automata driving Skafoi 1 vehicles with integrated Katastrophi 1 weaponry, and for the important cars, integrated Skafoi 1 bouncing devices driving down extreme tracks, with super deadly explosions. Sewer Hero features special guest star: random hunter who tried to kill us: as they try to get through the death-trap-filled sewer to reach the prize at the exit; a gift card to Olive Garden. "Food Bank" is an Epic-Meal-Time type show, in which Jack and Ben make the most crazy awesome foodstuffs they possibly can with an Exelixi device that produces infinite amounts of any kind of food. Concept: A Man V. Machine deathmatch in which contestants do what they can to stop GIANT ROBOTS from taking the Objective. -But we have to put the Hats in CRATES, and hand them out. Also the hats are all manes, and the locks on the crates are easily picked, or easily dismantled, or broken. Or, you could buy a special disintegrating key, which is a single use Katastrophic Disintegrating Aggravated Explosive Melee Weapon (Specific Target, Crate) that blows the crate RIGHT up. And if you're smart about it, you can put MULTIPLE crates in the blast radius. Then we just have a HAT TRADING BOOTH, in which you can trade in your hat for one of the other player's, if they are willing. Putting your hat up for trading costs 'rent' for the amount of time it's in the space though.

Infinite Power:

Vampires can only drink so much of a persons blood, because each Vitea drained deals one lethal damage to said person. As such, only the hardiest person (Giant (size 6), stamina 5) could potentially survive being drained to sated-ness by even the least powerful vampire in a hunger frenzy (BP 1, max pool 10, start at 0). However, Jack can Heal, at a 1:1 Lethal to Mania ratio.

Quote: ''Third Tier: Perspicacious Blood The character gains three Vitae for every two Vitae she takes from a human, and receives double the Vitae consumed from Kindred or other supernatural vessels.''

So, humans suddenly can give a minimum of 9 Vitae at full health, taking only six points of lethal damage. Lets say that Jack happens to be there, and can heal the damage for 6 mania (well, not really the last one because of fault, but you get the idea). Then you have a fully stocked with blood human from which to draw 9 more Vitae!

This probably doesn't sound sustainable, because eventually Jack would run out of mania, yeah? Well! That is where the TECHNOMANCER merit comes in. Three dot merit, and Jack can convert voluntarily given metanormal energy in mania (or vice versa) at a 1:1 ratio, at a rate of one point per turn. Ordinarily, this would be used for finishing Blood Rituals, or activating Contracts, or what have you, but with the increased amount of Vitae coming in from Perspicacious Blood, that additional energy can be stored in the form of Mania to be changed into anything at a later point.

Say, in a size 30 capacitor.

A single cycle would go something like: Gene drains two points of Vitae, dealing two lethal, gaining three Vitae. With BP 1, this takes two turns, or six seconds. Jack then heals the two damage. Depending on randomness, this can take between one turn (likely) to the heat death of the universe (should the dice decide that they hate Genius). For this purpose, two on average. Then, Jack converts Vitae to Mania (three turns) during which Gene has probably done his part. Wow, Jack sure is the limiting factor here. As such, the time taken for one mania/vitae of profit is 5 turns, or fifteen seconds. Four mania per minute, or a little less, as transferring to the Capacitor takes a round every three cycles. Sixteen seconds per Mania profit. Considering that typically a Genius must spend an entire hour on research to gain the same benefit, and there are limits on that (unmada checks), this system is probably the best thing.

As this loop can continue going for an unlimited amount of time, we can have an unlimited amount of Mania and Vitae, stored in the Processing Plant. 225 Mania/Vitae per hour is nothing to sneeze at.

Plan: Pie
I'm thinking Explosive damage of 10 miles for a -6 to Core Mod, Size 6 for +2, so total -4, then Mix it with an Exelixi 1 Curing Disease wonder, One Use for +2, Fragile for +1, Slow Reload of One day (auto reload) for +7, and a 20 minute charge up time for +4, which, using the Exelixi Gun variable, makes it rifle range automatically. Taking another -1 to make it artillery range lets me shoot the pie at a city center from a nearby mountaintop. Curing Cancer, AIDS, or other fatal diseases is only a -5, so if I get to Fellowship 5 and integrate it into my car (an additional +1, and now they bind no mania), I can use the Fellowship power to launch a pie into the city, have it explode and do bashing damage of 1 to everyone in a 10 mile radius, and one die to everyone in a 20 mile radius, and have the Exelixi device activate for no mania cost on everyone. Int(4)+Medicine(1)+9 dice to heal anyone's disease, - up to 5 for severity.

Plan: Orphan
Ok. So.

I made a joke while Gene and Flyboy were talking about morality, involving Jack having a plan to kidnap babies, because Abduction is only an Obligation 6 transgression and Jack is Ob 5, after Gene made a comment about how he's not one of the monsters who steals babies and children.

But that got me to thinking. After getting Fellowship 3, I'll be able to make Mechs for 0 bound mania. Size 10 mechs, I can make in a couple of days even. Just a 'Legs instead of Wheels' variable to a ground car (0 bound), attach two Automata 1 arms (0 bound) with maximum STR and DEX, (by this point I should have 5 inspiration) and use assembly line to integrate ExoSuits into the mechs (boosting STA and DEX for 1 bound mania per like, four), an integrated capacitor to power the integrated Healing Mechanism (0 bound), and you've got a Mech built in a week. 6 days, in fact, for everything. Then I rest on the seventh day. : P

So, the question then becomes, who do I have pilot the army of mechs that can rule the city under my bigger robot's iron fist? The answer becomes...

Orphans. There's gotta be an abundance of orphans in Atlanta. With this being the World of Darkness and people being murdered by vampires and werewolves and all that, and hunters getting themselves killed by the same, that leaves a number of children parentless. So, Jack goes around and becomes the stereotypical evil businessman, hiring cheap labor from orphanages, who are then inducted into the Mech-Fighting business.

Plan: Escape
A mole machine digs at 5*Inspiration yards per Turn. After Feeding the Hungry finally concludes, Jack will have 4 inspiration, making that 200 yards/3 seconds. Then, Variables happen. No Cover, +3. Slow acceleration (10% safe speed), +2. Charge-Up Time 20 minutes, +4. Mania Cost, -2. Speed for Handling, -10. 400 yards/ 3 seconds, 273 mile per hour safe speed after ten minutes, gives it about a 400 mph top speed, and we can have one hell of an escape tunnel. Also, still a +1 to handling.

Then, as this is a kitbashed device (one minute for a full scene), it breaks down at the conclusion of digging the tunnel, coming out at the New Fortress. This is where stuff starts getting made, stuff that doesn't need to be in the garage. In order to have a transport, the assembly line merit comes into play again. The SPACE ELEVATOR (Detailed elsewhere) is made, and an identical copy is made going Horizontally rather than Vertically. For no cost, entrance and exit from the Garage.

Outfit: Evil Overlord Mode

This diatribe made me think about how Jack could be a terrifying overlord. So, First off, Flying everywhere, 0 cost. Simply accomplished, It's a second Warbeak Flight Enabler. Second, practical immunity to attacks. This is the Defensive Magnetic Charger, an Internalized Katastrophic weapon. Size 0 (-2), Melee (0), Defensive (-3), gives Jack a Melee Bashing attack (+0B) and three extra defense. Then, an Internalized Prostasia Armor gives a base of one armor, then, with a Slow Reload of 1 day (automatic), and the invulnerable and bulletproof variables, the armor will protect against a single attack every day for 6/6, while downgrading ballistic damage from L or A to B and ignoring 30 points of automatic success damage from explosives and the like. With his ability to create a fearsome arsenal of weaponry in minutes, this makes Jack an incredible force to face.

I think that I might have two different fighting modes: ChainSword, in which I have no defense ever, but it doesn't matter since I only have 1 normally anyway, and I'll be supplementing that with Prostasia armor, and Ranged Combat, in which I utilize Flight, Speed, Immobilization, and Wits Boosting to have 4 defense and also Armor.

Then of course, when I start getting worn down, I go 'THIS ISN'T EVEN MY FINAL FORM', and get in the battle-mech.

A triggered Automata 1 Healer in a +1 Dex Exo-rig will be quite useful in this scenario. Automata don't have to make Unmada checks for draining capacitors, so UNLIMITED HEALING.

Of course, Warbeak will be taking the stage upon Jack's first 'defeat'. With her Imperial Battle-Sub. And then her Swain-Plane. Then her own Giant Robot Hawk. It shall land on the shoulder of Megas. And they shall be Pirates for a moment. Until they both fire lasers out of their eyes simultaneously.

Out of the Garage. 1a: 2, 3, 4 1b: 8,3,10->2,6 3a: 6,9,2 Swift, two, Animal Int 2a: 7,8,3 Magnificent, Stable, Melee attack that does +1/L 2b: 5,2,5 Hardy, Hardy, Human INT (Size 5*1.5*1.5=Size 11) 2c: 7,2,1 Magnificent, Human INT, WINGS 2d: 5,5,7 Hardy, Hardy, Magnificent (Size 5*1.5*1.5=Size 11) 9a: 7,8,6,6,4 Magnificent, Stable, Swiftx2, Hands 9b: 7,4,3,3,8 Magnificent, Hands, Melee Attack(2L),Stable 9z: 7,5,1 Magnificent, Hardy, Wings 9æ: 8,2,9 Magnificent, Animal Int, Two small G1: 10,2,4,3,1 Human Int, Can Hold things with for-legs, +1L, FLIGHT. G2: 1,9,5 TWO OF THEM, and they are STRONGER THAN NORMAL AND CAN FLY AS WELL.

Thread Ideas
Operation: Arcade Thunder, (Going Turbo) In which They Play Games.

New Thesis Thread: For Inspiration 5, perhaps with Carter gaining Inspiration 2. Artificer: Build New Things = Thesis. Hoffnung: Bring Vision of Reality closer to the Truth = Thesis Director: Exploration of Interpersonal Relationships = Thesis Navigator: Engage in Exploration and Conflict = Thesis Staunen: Exploration of Self and object of Fascination = Thesis Klagen: warning or protecting people from an upcoming disaster = Thesis

Operation: Be the Sp8der In which they get vengeance on the Ants that disrupted their picnic. Because OBVIOUSLY it was the ants that made it less than enjoyable.

PM
Well, should the next few threads have the weaponry that we imagine going through it, justifying Katastrophi 5 should be no problem. We've got potentially zombies Out of the Garage, a small child beatdown in the Hunger thread, ALL OF the Vertex Devils' race, and...

Oh jeeze. I 'GUESS' I'm working on the first game through the second game, what with trying to figure out a way to get rid of the evil lake with the minimum investiture of mania, (and having decided that the Tangling Taser doesn't need to be binding three points of mania when I can get the same effect for one (Rerolls not giving me any more damage, after all)) while working on gaining as much power through the second game as possible in as short a time as possible. Third game so far has gotten the second game and some end-first game equipment ironed out... Speaking of which, how's 88 for the mania cost sound on the Octet? If we throw on Variable Damage and Variable Explosion, Clinging (-2 version), and a die of Blinding (or Armor piercing, but that's just overkill), we've got 88 damage, 44 explosive force, and the next turn everything in the blast radius taking another 43 dice of aggravated damage, then 42, then 41...

Level one suits of protective armor for no mania cost? Hell's yeah. That could make Death Race even more badass, where everyone has a battle-suit on inside of their car, and on occasion when a robot or player's car gets smashed, he gets out and actually fights the rest of the cars in hand-to-bumper combat.

We could license the song, play it during the actual show, no problem. That's what Post Production is for. : D

That's the intent. Alex and I planned this out back when there were only three genii, and As Soon as I have Skafoi 3 I can build Megas without ever having to change the base parts again. In totality, he'll bind one more mania than I thought with Fellowship 3, but still, 4 mania's not too bad for all three methods of transportation in one wonder. (the goal is to make the Hot Rod an integrated control station on the top (for a total of 6 bound mania until the fellowship is achieved), and since with enough wits you can modify variables on the fly, a control station that can drive off of the head at the drop of a hat) I do need to get more potential mania though, my pool of four is not going to cut it for much longer, I don't think.

Hell yes we are! All Ben needs is an excuse to justify Katastrofi 5 (I've already spent the XP for it and it's on my sheet, but I don't know if Isador knows about it :P) and the power of the power of The Octet will be ours! Then we can get ALL the treasure, and...

...and...

...Wait a second.

We're basically playing three games here. There's the crazy First Game, where we combine variables and manipulate data to create insane weapons/equipment with a bunch of other players. We're all sort of working towards a main "goal," although none of us are exactly sure what it is (even the ones who are supposedly running the show, like Flyboy and Isador).

So instead we focus most of our attention on the Second Game: the one we build for ourselves. We invent RP scenarios like the Insect Kingdoms and play them out while we're waiting for the real plot to unfold. There are secret plots, in-game alliances, and the occasional character disagreement and/or PvP deathmatch.

And then there's the Third Game; the one that's just us talking. All of us talking to each other through PMs and various chat clients (I've seen MSN, Skype, and Yahoo mentioned at least), making references to things and generally giving the other two games context. And now here we are planning to create the Fluorite Octet, one of the most powerful weapons imaginable, for use in the Second Game. Although Jegus knows that we'll eventually use it in the First Game too. The important one.

SPOILER: [-] The First Game, with the crazy elaborate plot, the equipment creation system, and all the weird timey-wimey stuff that we occasionally deal with, is Sburb. The second game, with all the roleplay scenarios we create for ourselves, the secret plots, and the infin8 irons everyone has clogging up their fires, is FLARP. The third game, the one with all the PM chains and chat clients, are the chatlogs and personal storylines.

You, me, Alex, and the entire Dirge are an alternate universe version of the troll session. The Blizzard was probably some kind of Scratch, wiping out the previous session and allowing ours to exist.

in my dream we are the trolls. its us

and THEN Bec Noir comes

for a

little one on one

That could still be pretty amusing, actually! I don't know if we'd put it on SCIE(NCE) for secrecy reasons, but going on the greatest American road trip in history with a fleet of cars armed to the teeth with cancer cures sounds pretty awesome to me! If my six months of ripping off Green Hornet and Kick Ass are done by then, I could make all the AIs suits of armor as well. For EXTRA NOT-DYING POWER. :D

That would be awesome! ...on one condition. This song starts to play while we're in mid-air, and keeps going while we're jumping from island to island. Or something else suitably epic. Because RACING MUSIC VROOOOOM!

Hmm... okay, so lots of opportunities for exploding zombie factories! Hopefully Ben will get to fight an true undead one like Alex did in Paperwork, though. I LOVE ME SOME ZOMBIE KILLIN' :D

SPOILER: [-] Sikla said something about zombies roasting a person over coals at the picnic in the C-Box. That'd be a fun twist.

Lol! That sounds like a really badass fighting game, actually. Russian mechs and the allied navy vs. Godzilla and whatever crazy support Japan has. And we're going to jump right in the middle with a giant robot. With a car for a head. Some of these threads can't come soon enough. :D

Ha HA! TIme to invest those two XP. We're only planning on creating one of the most powerful weapons we can use with the nature of this game... SPOILER: [-] Image

And, should there be cancer/AIDS/cancerAIDS in the next 20 miles, they all get 6 dice for being cured. Amazing, for many reasons. The best part is that it would bind no mania, due to being integrated into the car, and we can go on a road trip around the country, curing one city at a time. Actually, at that point, with I can have quite a few cars binding no mania around, and since I won't even have to be using Assembly Line on this, we can have a fleet of Cancer Killers going around the world. Like Death Race, but for the good of humanity instead of for their amusement.

Or, to convert the track into a falling jump-track, as seen in every video game ever, in which the contestants have to fling their cars from falling island to falling island in order to not be crushed by gravity or the other islands. We could have a part where we have to leap of faith off of a cliff during the race, and drive down the teleported series of flying islands.

Well, there's Automata factories, which can make humans at rank 4, blank at two dots in academics, science and medicine. Those, if you look at a literal interpretation of 'blank' could be classified as zombies. Or, he could be referring to the fact that he plans to make a bunch of Zombie level intelligence robots for the death-races and such. That would be fun. I'd get to use my chainsaw, so much. The Mech would be from the 'World War II goes on forever' bardo. We've got... Wait, I don't think I actually made a write-up for that one. Meh. Basically, America doesn't build the nuclear bomb, and Japan keeps fighting the world after Germany gets taken out of the fight. Russia and America never have the falling out, and Europe becomes... modern day Europe. Japan grows bio-weapons in the form of Godzilla-type creatures and Mechs, while America builds Naval Fleets with air support to help the much closer Russian forces: Tank and Mech warfare on their part.

I have two dots in Assembly Line as of earlier today, so get to investin'! :D I do have to ask; what crazy doomsday device are you (and probably Alex) planning?? 82THE8TH???

No! D: I guess that makes sense, though (Increased Mania cost: +infinity, then use it for zero Mania). +11 is still enough to Auto-Cure everyone within 10 miles, though, which is still pretty amazing.

Yes. Like transporting portions of the track (and the race) to the mooooon!

Of course I did! It was really cool. I do have to ask, though: what's a zombie factory? Are we going to be fighting some evil mastermind who mass-produces zombie warriors to clog our gun barrels with dead bodies? And wait, which bardo? Is that where Megas is going to punch out a Japanese mech?

If you have the Assembly Line merit by then, Alexander and I can invest in Universalist (Katastrophi) and use them as well! A high enough mania cost will render all of those variables I usually use to bring up the modifier null, and since most of my stuff falls under 'low cost so I can shove more mania into capacitors', spending 64 mania to reload the weapon for a lot of damage and at least 40 shots of that for the cost will be amazing. hint: The Octet See, the problem with that is the fellowship power specifically says that the wonder being used in that manner cannot benefit from the Mania Cost variable, and since the point of activating it for free is to avoid the cost associated with actually curing the diseases (1 mania per cure), it makes that method useless; That's why it has that insane assortment of variables, with a total of +11.

Explosive is the best variable. When you put it on Skafoi Ray, and aim those at the curves on the track, ANYTHING can happen.

I have no idea, and just hope it fails the Dex+Athletics check to avoid being knocked prone and losing its action, since the immobilization part failed.

Oh hey, you actually read the whole thing. Yeah, that commercial has mega spoilers in it. Well, we already talked about using a Vodka launcher to cook steaks on that show, a flamethrower doesn't seem that much of a stretch. We came up for the whole story of that bardo too; it involves World War II going on for all of eternity.

Huh, I better make room on my schedule for that. Not that I have one.
 * D

Maybe we wouldn't make a reasonable amount of money, but we would have a reasonable amount of fun! ...Reasonable might not be quite enough to justify doing it, though. :P On a similar subject, I would be totally up for destroying the giant pig-monster in the woods! Once Ben gets Skafoi 4 he can make whatever insane insta-death machine you have planned fire in every conceivable dimension at once. Or just the ones that matter. So enjoy getting physically shot, ghost!

That shouldn't be too hard, considering how crazy the Mania Cost variable can make a core modifier. Especially when you have as much Mania as we do lying around.

But the most important question: do the twists themselves explode?

I like that idea! Plan A right now is resisting the awful scream that is currently breaking our ears, though. DX Part of me thinks it'll be some kind of demonically possessed child (which we can't kill because ETHICS TEST), but I'm hoping it's something more Genius-y. Like a robotic gremlin inhabited by the souls of a million dead alternate-timeline astronauts. Which, as I just remembered, already exists today.

Okay, try number two! Shooty shooty dakka dakka, Ben in a bunch of crazy situations like this (only with insect girls - alternative guess: POWER RANGERS), and...

SPOILER: [-] Megas XLR, if Jack and Delanta's part in the SCIE(NCE) ad is based on future events. Also, I'm apparently going to cook a steak with a flamethrower, which is amazing, and you're going to punch out Mechagodzilla. VISION 8FOLD.

It is a good movie! Basically a kid tries to be a real-life superhero, gets beaten up so badly he increases his pain tolerance and gets and bunch of metal implants on his bones, and accidentally gets involved with a bunch of "real" superheroes who are trying to take on the mob. It's practically Ben McCarthy's life story! There's actually a sequel coming out shortly, which looks pretty good too.

It might take a long time to join the Sentinels, but I'm actually looking forward to the six months of fighting crime! Why? Because I don't need full membership ASAP, and it gives me an excuse to fight tons of crime for six months. The STs might even help. How awesome is that? :D

Jack Vanatis Message subject: Re: In All Due HasteFolder: Sent messages I dunno if the outbreaks would survive long enough with us on the job to make any kind of reasonable money out of it. However, if we managed to secure a contract of some sort from, say, Gene, to hunt down a giant pig ghost in the woods, I can put together quite the weapon for that. Extremely mania intensive to start up, but then we will [not] care about its 19 defense.

All I have to do is make sure that it rolls 7 dice for "damage" with the core modifier, and the -5 from cancer will bring it down to 2, which gets cut in half for 1 automatic success. Best Pie Ever. I don't know if he'd be 'evil', just less... sane. Twists are all we have going for us! Twists and explosions.

If the clean-up crew is there for more than a day, I can have them try out the new fault, realize how impossible it is for people to eat dry food without water, and change the fault again. Or, I could do a 1 hour fault change roll, and if it doesn't work, well, I've already rolled for the full day and waited that full day, so plan A continues.

Close on three of them!

I need to watch that movie one of these days. As of now, I've read the reasons that the guy in green made all of the conflict happen, and I've seen the last 5 minutes four times, but I have no idea what it's about. (Yeah, that 6 months fighting crime is why the Vertex Devils edged out the Iridium Sentinels for which Fellowship I'd join. Either one I could make work for my end-goals, but 6 months? Ha, at MOST the race will take three months) Thu Mar 14, 2013

It's cool enough that there even is a "cure all the diseases plan!" Although I did just realize something; that writeup made it sound like finding a cootie-free school might be kind of a headache for Inspired parents. I wonder how much we could make as professional cootie eliminators?

Oh, of course! AUTO-CURE! That's even awesome-er! XD

That would be great! ...err, not great that Jack is going to turn evil, but great that the show might have such a SHOCKING TWEEST.

I saw!! It might not be too debilitating depending on Isador and Sikla's definition of "dry," at least, and it doesn't seem like we'll actually be feeding the hungry for a while. :P

...Anime, John Woo, and...

SPOILER: [-] ...Gurren Lagann?!? :o

Speaking of plots, I have a new iron to possibly add to the fire! To actually JOIN the Iridium Sentinels you have to spend six months, officially or unofficially, "fighting crime." So maaaybe, long after the Thesis and all the other plots (probably sometime during the SCIE(NCE) arc)...

...Well, I'll put it this way. Ever wonder where I got the idea for Ben's minigun jetpack?

One of these days. After building some sort of non-pie, non-explosive based cure device, probably. A precursor to the 'Cure all the diseases' plan, perhaps?

Well, AUTO-CURE all the diseases in a 10 mile radius, based on automatic successes, and then potentially curing every disease in a 20 mile radius. :D

And depending on how far into the narrative of the show it's gotten by the point at which Jack breaks ties with the Artificers (though not the collaborative, of course) the audience may still think that Alexander is the main villain of the show, due to his army of robo-cars. The dramatic turn when one of the main protagonists becomes a villain, with all the powers they had before hand, is a trope for a reason.

Agh, cannot get a non-debilitating fault with that thing. I thing tasting really bad was better than 'can't ever drink again if eating from this machine, and can't make 90% of the things a regular one can'. Oh well, looks like it won't be important to change for a while, at least.

WELL, the post DID come with a link.


 * D You have successfully guessed at three of my plans.

A bonus! Don't ask me why, but if the adventures of the Vanatis Garage were an Anime...

(mute the video on the left)

...this would be our intro.

Looking at my last PM, I forgot to mention the amazing commercial that Alex wrote for the SCIE(NCE) Channel. Holy crap that's amazing!! That would probably work /as an actual commercial,/ not just as something for a nWoD chronicle.

That might actually be kind of awesome! Imagine going into a Genius run school in full hazmat gear to exterminate a cootie outbreak, possibly with huge vacuum cleaners and a near infinite supply of circles and dots for inoculation. CDC's got nothing on us.

...So you're going to cure practically every disease in a 10 mile radius. For no Mania cost. By launching an exploding pie at Atlanta. That's completely insane! It's ludicrous, I tell you! Ludicrous!

SPOILER: [-] Why didn't I think of that?! XD

Of course, of course. Going mad with power is infinitely more Genius-y than just going mad (believe it or not :P). It would be an interesting spin on Death Race indeed, possibly making Jack into the "villain" of the show. ...and setting up a chance for EPIC REDEMPTION, of course.

Woohoo, Thesis! I'm going to post Ben showing up in the thread now. :D

Oh, and Alexander wrote up a Thing for the SCIE(NCE) Channel.

Quote: -Floating in space, outside of a Soviet Union spacecraft, looking down on Earth-

Boris: It never gets old, huh? Warbeak: Tweet. Boris: It almost makes me want to... Warbeak: Tweet twee twee twee tweet? Boris: Da.

I love explosions,

-A zombie factory explodes-

I love weird science things,

-Shot of Jim looking at Jack's boxes of capacitors-

Twee twee t' tweet tweet

-Shot of Luna fixing Jack's car with Mania-

T' twee 't twee 't tweet!

-Shot of Jack tazing a zombie raccoon-

Ananyov: I love the whole world,

-Ananyov deadpanning the camera-

A DeathRace AI: And all its sights and sounds!

-Shot of the AI in the cockpit driving at high speeds, surrounded by various explosions-

Shannon: Boom-de-yah-da, boom-de-yah-da

-Shannon singing to herself while she stirs a Goulash-

Hobo: Boom-de-yah-da, boom-de-yah-da. ..

-The briefcase stealing hobo mumbling to himself-

Gene: Ah hate the sewers,

-Gene at the starting line of Sewer Hero-

Ben: I love a mystery

-Ben scanning evidence on WCI-

Jack: Da red wuns go fast!

-Jack overtaking another car in a Vertex Devils race-

Jim: I don't like entropy.

-Schizophrenic Jim staring at the piece of coal he's holding-

Ben: I love our network,

-Cooking a steak with a flamethrower on Food Bank-

Luna: And all our craziness!

-Shot of Luna having a tea party with Warbeak, Mars, and Boris, raising her glass to the camera-

Jack, Alexander, and Ben: Boom-de-ya-da, boom-de-yah-da

-Shot of Jack, Alexander, and Ben at Olive Garden as a fresh basket of breadsticks is placed on the table-

Studio Audience: Boom-de-ya-da, boom-de-yah-da!

-Shot of Boris Talks/Hola Presidente's holographic studio audience-

Alexander: I love new Bardos!

-Alexander in a Kirov airship, looking down on the alternate timeline USSR-

Alexander: I don't love vacuum tubes

-An annoyed Alexander carefully disassembling a radio-

Jack: I love huge robots!

-Jack standing at Mega's feet-

Delanta: I bet chicks dig them, too.

-The camera pans out to show Delanta is suddenly standing next to Jack, startling him-

Everyone: I love Atlanta,

-A shot of the entire Collaborative in the control room of a flying saucer-

Everyone: It's such a crazy place!

-A shot of the saucer flying across the night sky-

Cowboys: Boom-de-ah-da, boom-de-ah-da,

-A group of cowboys known by the Collaborative sitting around a fire in the Endless Sea of the West, one of whom has a banjo-

Raven: <>

-One of Jim's ravens, pushing buttons on the lift and riding the thing as it goes crazy-

Troops: BOOM-DE-AH-DA!

-A group of Russian and American troops cheering as Megas KOs a Japanese warmech with a haymaker-

The Collaborative Again: Boom-de-ah-da, boom-de-ah-da. . . (fading)

-Boris and Warbeak doing backflips in space-

-The SCIE(NCE) logo appears, along with the tagline: "The world is just awesome."

-A few seconds pass, and a second tagline fades into view: "So are we."

The channel itself now has its first commercial.

Speaking of that curing all conceivable diseases thing...

SPOILER: [-] Cooties Cooties are a microbiological Maniacal life form, an infectious disease. Mere mortals are immune, of course, any Cooties that try to infect a mortal dies in a puff of Havoc. The first touch of puberty also confers immunity. Young Geniuses and Manes (it's quite the epidemic in some Bardos), on the other hand, can be infected by airborne Cooties immediately after touching a member of the opposite sex or anyone currently suffering from an active outbreak. Despite their unusual nature, Cooties use the normal systems for resisting disease, add +3 if the Genius has kept their cootie shots up to date. The primary symptom of Cooties is social ostracization. In the long term growing up with the presence of Cooties in key formative years can have permanent effects on one's social confidence and views of the opposite gender, responsible Genius parents check schools for the presence of dormant Cooties before enrolling their children, others prefer to immunize their children or just sterilize the school grounds themselves.

During an outbreak of Cooties sufferers lose 10-again and deduct 1s from any Social roll made with other children young enough to be vulnerable, even mere mortals. If a sufferer rolls a one and no Successes, upgrade the Failure to a Dramatic Failure. Cooties can be cleared up with Exelixi, normal medicine in some Bardos or just waiting around three days.

Details: I'm thinking Exelixi Ray, which allows me to add all the Katastrophi variables to an Exelixi disease-curing device. Explosive damage of 10 miles for a -6 to the wonder, Size 6 for +2, then Mix it with an Exelixi 1 Curing Disease wonder, One Use for +2, Fragile for +1, Slow Reload of One day (auto reload) for +7, and a two minute charge up time for +3. Curing Cancer, AIDS, or other fatal diseases is only a -5, so if I get to Fellowship 5 and integrate it into my car (an additional +1 for integrated, and another +1 from fellowship level two, and now they bind no mania for level three), I can use the Fellowship level five power to launch a pie into the city, have it explode and have the Exelixi device activate for no mania cost on everyone in a 10 mile radius. Int-3(unskilled)+11 dice to heal anyone's disease, - up to 5 for severity.

Well, not until I gain a bit more power at least. Then it would go to Jack's head, and lead to him trying to improve the world by force. It would certainly be an interesting twist in the Death Racing show.

No reason to put it off then. I'll announce my intention in the CBox, then make the thread.

I just looked at level one of the various Axioms, and you are totally right. Laser beams that eat people's stats with Katastrofi, AUTOMATIC SUCCESSES on disguise checks as literally anyone with Metaptropi, curing all conceivable diseases with Exelixi...

But yeah, we're going to be rich. :D

What? How would that work?? I need details, man! Details!

Exactly! Jack has a plausible reason to go Lemurian, and with your variable-messing-with skills you could build all kinds of insane, cool, and dangerous inventions! Jack would probably become a really awesome Villain, and all the other Geniuses would be unable to stop him!

...

But, uhh, y'know. Totally don't do that or anything. :-D


 * rimshot*

Good news! The Dacia Sandero is finally coming to the UK!

...

Wait, hold on a tic. I'm being told that's not the good news. I sent Sikla a PM, and she's agreed to ST our Thesis thread!

Here's her latest PM:

SPOILER: [-] Well, I've got a mane NPC that I carried over from my FMA RP, just haven't found a place to use her. I suppose your thesis, should you choose to accept it, could be a test of your collaborative's ethics. It's been made very clear that the Atlanta Collaborative's motto is "Humanity First", but proving it would mean you would reach a higher understanding of consciousness.


 * D The things you can do when you look at what the lowest levels of each axiom can do, particularly when you start messing with variables.

Speaking of curing cancer, I've got an idea that revolves around mixing Katastrophi and Exelixi after getting Fellowship level 5. More details after being mysteriously obtuse and tight-fisted with the facts for a PM!

But Jack is like the only person on the site who cold legitimately go Lemurian at this point! Well, more likely, after gaining fellowship using his Artificer leanings, going Echo Doctor, but still.

Ha. 'Cus it's insects. : P

Oh noooooo. I guess I might talk to some people. Probably not gonna find anyone, but that's how it goes.

...We're going to be millionaires.

I love pill form! It makes me wish that Ben had Exelixi pretty frequently, since that variable and axiom go together like peanut butter and chocolate. Literally. Because you can make your cancer cures take like chocolate peanut butter.

Man you're good at that. For the love of science, please never become a Lemurian! XD That writeup is awesome, though. I guess the lesson is "Mantises are scary, so don't screw with them. Because they have insect kung-fu." It's a good lesson. Mostly/Solely because Ben isn't going to mess with them.

Lol, like I said: if that happens. I don't know how much plot value there is in watching Ben flirt with a bunch of NPCs, but I do know you'd probably need a magnifying glass to find it. :P

Aye. Between STing for Gene's dog thread and generally being a little burned out on posting, she's probably having trouble coming up with anything good to post. I think we might need more players in addition to more STs.

With an automata 1 factory? 1 mania per 10 size points. : D

In pill form is one of the best variables.

All of those seem fairly simple, except the mantis one. Easy for me though; Katastrophi 2 (Exelixi 1, Metatropi 1, Automata 1), 5L. Size 4, melee no cost, for +1, trade all but one of the damage for Defensive, and the other one for autofire. Do that think with Exelixi 1 they did with the B - Wing to give an extra point of weaponry and Athletics when using the Claws, and double them, one on each arm, to make them super effective. 5 Defense from each one, plus their normal defense, and the ability to attack everyone around them with both their claws for 6 mania, and ALL of their attacks use weaponry instead of brawl and do lethal damage. Plus normal looking, 'cus Mantis.

Suddenly NWOD game turns into a dating sim!

Well, the edibility of the food all depends on her posting for the dog in Lost:. Once no one can stomach the stuff, Jack can spend a day changing the fault instead of making more capacitors.

...That might just be the best idea ever. How much Mania would that cost?! Whatever it is, it's probably worth the infinity resource dots we can get from selling them!

SPOILER: [-] After we build one for ourselves, of course. Because diamond jetcars are awesome. And can probably double as a mole machine drill bit in an emergency.

It's a good thought process! Because those Wonders are awesome! Mostly because they're extra limbs, body parts, organs, etc. that don't make you roll for degeneration and don't require "fail twice, you die instantly" surgery to install. Which, as was stated above, is awesome.

I wonder if the other Kingdoms have similar Wonders that fit their society? The ants might have Exelixi strength boosters for the "ants can carry 100 times their own weight" thing, the spider assassins probably have Eprikato "don't notice me" shrouds and webshooters for quick escapes, the mantises have "fighting styles" that defy gravity through Skafoi and hit many people at once through Autofire (because nothing says it can't effect melee weapons too)...

Lol! Ben's going to have an interesting time in the Insect Kingdoms, I bet. :P Especially if the spider girl gets jealous, and starts trying to do away with her competition... SPOILER: [-] ...Unless there's a more comedic spin to the whole thing, where he has to keep all of them happy or risk a huge diplomatic snafu (even though not all of them like each other). Or double unless none of this happens at all.

Woohoo, the future is on its way! I noticed that Luna has been STing a thread for Isador and Flyboy while they're both busy, so my hope is that she might be able to do our Thesis too. Our thesis where, hopefully, the food we're serving is actually edible. XD

Mainly, wood is light, rubber is what tires are made of, and diamonds are made out of carbon. We've decided to start building cars out of pencils, using an automata factory, which, with crafts level four, allows you to automate the building of things with 'JET ENGINES' complexity. We put some wings on the side, and we have created unlimited non-wondrous flying cars out of pencils.

And that is exactly the thought process that leads to the Bees being the hotspot for genii. I'm actually going to put the whole guild write-up here from the source:

SPOILER: [-] [quote=Ambrosia Makers]The Ambrosia Makers The Ambrosia Makers began as a Guild in bee themed bardo called "The Field of Flowers". There, the progress of technology has proceeded fairly normally, but the Ambrosians have hoarded and jealously guarded a particular type of technology. It is said that the beemen of ages past had wings, chitinous exo-skeletons and eyes that could discern the hidden properties of items. While beemen of today can have those same things, to do so they must go to the Ambrosians. While the Ambrosians have jealously guarded the secrets in the past, both for the power it confers, and the need to regulate and prevent its misuse, those attitudes have slowly shifted. Discovery of the bardo by the Peerage have resulted in a spur of technological growth and the Ambrosians have slowly seen their secrets slip from their grasp. In order to not be seem as hoarders of outdated ideas, the group has decided to adapt. They've adopted the Fellowship model and have started adding fresh members, actively pursuing Inspired from among the beemen.

Aesthetics

The Ambrosians' wonders usually take two forms. The first is some sort of pill, powder, or as is traditional among the Ambrosians, a blend of honey. The second, is the growth of some sort organ in the user, like wings or jumping legs for Skafoi, chitinous armor for Prostasia, or extra or modified eyes for Apokalypsi. As such, the wonders have an organic look to them.

Foundations and Catalysts The vast majority of the Ambrosians members are from the Field Of Flowers. As mentioned earlier, the Fellowship actively courts the Inspired among the Beemen, so no particular Fellowship is more represented. Progenitors and Navigators have a slight edge in numbers though.

Scholarship Requirements Medicine 2 or Science(Biology)

Fellowship Requirements Inspiration 3+ Medicine 3 Science 3 Status: (Field Of Flowers) Obligation 6+(The Ambrosians are well aware of the effect of unfettered changes on one's mental state. Any that head down that path are kicked out)

Wonders The Ambrosians have about a half dozen wonders that they regularly produce for general use. The schematics and procedures are freely available to those members who want them, but they typically aren't permitted to take them outside the guildhall. Apart from these, there are other wonders that are affected. Restorative Exelixi and temporary Metatropi wonders with the Pill Form variables. Others, that introduce wondrous organ growth are also covered, but only those that induce a temporary transformation, and have the Limited Usage variable. Alternately, they can be built without Exelixi, at which point they decay in about a month's time. In order to have a Permanent transformation, other than the half dozen listed below, requires submitting the plans, a faultless wonder, extensive field testing using a temporary version of the wonder, and the approval of the Ambrosian leadership(ST approval) and is still an Obligation 4 transgression. Though the above factors give bonuses on the roll.

The Wonders below are culturally accepted, are permanent, and don't provoke an Obligation 4 transgression roll.

Antennae Telepathic Communicator/Scanner Construction:Lower of Academics/Medicine Requires: Apokalypsi 2, (Exelixi 1, Automata 1) Bound Mania: 2 Size: 0 Range: 10" Cost: None Roll: Wits + Academics - 1 Variables: Narrow Focus(Only Mechanical/Projective Telepathy +1), Internalized

This wonder is typically only provided to Law Enforcement. It slightly modifies the users' antennae in order to send and receive brainwaves.

B – Wing Construction: Medicine Requires: Skafoi 2, (Exelixi 1, Metatropi 1, Automata 1) Bound Mania: 2 Size: 5 (large folded wings) Initial Cost: 2 Mania Cost per Use: 2 Mania per six hours of travel Safe Speed: 20 mph Maximum Speed: 30 mph Acceleration: 10 mph/turn Variables: Hovering, Normal-looking Handling: Dexterity + (lower of Athletics and Drive)

This wonder causes a pair of bee wings to sprout from the user's back. The wonder is designed to hook up directly into user's nervous system, and provides 1 rank of Athletics and Drive strictly for the purpose of using this it. The effect stacks with the user's current Athletics and Drive.

It used to be that only flowerjacks made regular use of this wonder, but they were so convenient, that they became very popular.

Chitinous Exoskin Construction: Medicine Requires: Prostasia(*),(Metatropi 1), (Exelixi 1) Bound Mania: Varies(Based on level of Prostatia used) Size: 5 Cost: None Core Modifier: +1 Variables: Normal-looking

This wonder modifies the users skin to make it more durable. The variable “Normal looking” was eventually added by popular demand, because it looked “gross” otherwise.

Eye Scan Construction: Lower of Academics/Medicine Requires: Apokalypsi 2, (Exelixi 1, Automata 1) Bound Mania: 2 Size: 0 Range: 10” Cost: None Roll: Wits + Computer -1 Variables: Internalized, Goggles(Eyes), Normal-looking

This wonder modifies the users eyes in order to scan persons and objects.

Forearms Construction: Medicine Requires: Automata 1, (Metatropi 1, Exelixi 1) Size: 2 Core Modifier: +1 Variables: Biological, Limited Battery Life(8hrs rest, +1), Extra Limb(One extra limb, -1), Normal-looking

The wonder creates a 2 extra limbs on the user. They are biological and connected to user's nervous system. Unless stated elsewhere, assume they were created with someone with an Inspiration of 2, and so by default have a Str and Dex of 2. The Dextrous Limbs can also be applied to this wonder if the user so choose, and higher Inspiration genii can of course create stronger versions of these limbs.

Mark of Royalty Construction: Medicine Requires: Automata 5, (Exelixi 1, Metatropi 1) Size: 10 Cost per Use: 4 Mania per rank of the wonder at a rate of one Size point per hour (5 Mania/minute, 6 Mania/turn) Variables: Dynamic Factory (anything), Natural-looking

Typically only given to ruling, or as in the current case, the figurehead Queen. Its also rarely given to other who are highly recognized for their contributions to beeman society. The wonder creates an additional abdominal segment that grows near the base of the user's spine. It can create clones of the user that grow from an egg. These are blank persons, and do not have any personality. It can also produce different people, provide that the user has a genetic sample to use. These genetic samples remain on "file" indefinitely. However the real usage of the Mark of Royalty is to produce other wonders. The wonders must be liquid, gel or powder form, and are ingested. They can then be reproduced via the wonder. If the wonder is not one user's own wonders, it becomes orphan, but can be automatically adopted with no role required.

Stingers Construction: Medicine Requires: Katastrophi 1, (Exelixi 1, Metatropi 1) Bound Mania: 1 Size: 0 Damage: 5 Bashing (Venom) Range: Melee Roll: Strength + Brawl + 4 Init Cost: 1 Variables: Melee Weapon, Normal-looking

This wonder modifies the users fingernails in order to produce a toxic venom. These wonders are semi common, and are the equivalent of a taser or pepper spray.[/quote]

Oh noooooes, now Ben's getting seduced by the Ant ladies, the Bee ladies, the Wasp ladies, and one Spider.

Sweet, A thesis is a thing that might happen. Hopefully the dog thread gets to the point at which I can have a reason to change the fault before the thread starts though.

Cool! What kind of stuff have you guys thought of?

Good point! I hadn't thought of that, actually. Those wings look pretty cool though. I wonder if we could get some if we got on good terms with the Ambrosia Makers? I know Ben already has a jetpack, but bee wings are just cool.

SPOILER: [-] My B-wings bring the lady hornets to the yard, And I'm like, HOLY SHIT THE YARD IS FULL OF HORNETS! RUN!! RUUUUN!!! AAAAH THIS SONG IS WAY TOO OLD

...Yeah, we'd probably still have to roll anyway. XD

SPOILER: [-] Anything is feasible if you're crazy enough! Especially when that crazy involves missiles.

Hell yes! I think you just make it look easy, though. That's some pretty complex variable usage! It's exactly what would make that awesome missile, though. Which makes it, like the missile, awesome.

I just did! :D

Indeed it is. We discovered some amazing things that you can do with an Automata 1 factory and a very small amount of mania, that will leave a car non-wondrous.

From what I've been imagining, it was more the second one, with all the kingdoms. After all, why else would the inhabitants have to rely on a guild to gain wonders that function as the inherent insect abilities? SPOILER: [-] [quote= Ambrosia Guild]The Ambrosia Makers began as a Guild in bee themed bardo called "The Field of Flowers". There, the progress of technology has proceeded fairly normally, but the Ambrosians have hoarded and jealously guarded a particular type of technology. It is said that the beemen of ages past had wings, chitinous exo-skeletons and eyes that could discern the hidden properties of items. While beemen of today can have those same things, to do so they must go to the Ambrosians...

The Ambrosians' wonders usually take two forms. The first is some sort of pill, powder, or as is traditional among the Ambrosians, a blend of honey. The second, is the growth of some sort organ in the user, like wings or jumping legs for Skafoi, chitinous armor for Prostasia, or extra or modified eyes for Apokalypsi...

B – Wing Construction: Medicine Requires: Skafoi 2, (Exelixi 1, Metatropi 1, Automata 1) Bound Mania: 2 Size: 5 (large folded wings) Initial Cost: 2 Mania Cost per Use: 2 Mania per six hours of travel Safe Speed: 20 mph Maximum Speed: 30 mph Acceleration: 10 mph/turn Variables: Hovering, Normal-looking Handling: Dexterity + (lower of Athletics and Drive)

This wonder causes a pair of bee wings to sprout from the user's back. The wonder is designed to hook up directly into user's nervous system, and provides 1 rank of Athletics and Drive strictly for the purpose of using this it. The effect stacks with the user's current Athletics and Drive.

It used to be that only flowerjacks made regular use of this wonder, but they were so convenient, that they became very popular. [/quote]

Hmmm, lets see... Oh what, Transgression level one? But they really deserved it. Yeah, probably not a valid argument. SPOILER: [-] Feasible though, with assembly line and an Apokolysi trigger.

Skafoi vehicle, single use, short term, with integrated collapsable single-use short term Katastrophi explosives (with Automata trigger), set to de-collapse and fire when the transport device fails? Sounds easy, really.

Well, I PM'd thon about two weeks ago about it, but since I haven't gotten a response, I'm thinking the message either got skimmed or lost. I'd rather not send another one though, so if you could...

...Science my Vehicle? Please, please tell me that's exactly what I think it is. THIS NETWORK IS BUILT UPON MY DREAMS.

Woohoo, superweapon building! That kind of a bomb might be useful if a city (or even just part of a city) is taken over with something inhuman and evil that we don't care about killing, like a sentient plant mass or a shambling tide of zombies. As for the seduction attempts... it depends on what the ants actually look like. Ben will either be insanely scared out of his mind, or weirdly intrigued. ...but still insanely scared out of his mind, because spider assassins are lurking about.

Weeell... It was less "genocide" and more "wiping out an army of rapist slave-owning sociopaths that were attempting to take over and/or murder the US," but still. We'd probably be rolling on the Transgression table for it anyway. :P

SPOILER: [-] The Genocide option is nuking the entire US, but that's just stupid.

Nukes are ALWAYS on the table! Although I was thinking something more like this, so we can hit multiple Martian Attack Cruisers with one missile. We would also get to launch a missile without becoming antagonists, which is awesome.

YES! I am SO looking forward to all of the crazy plots kicking off. We should probably ask Isador about the Thesis thing soon, too. Because the faster we all get Inspiration 4, the faster we can start building crazy awesome stuff! I already have plans for a UAV drone written up, for example...

And Alexander and I just added yet another show to the network's lineup. Science my Vehicle. : D I regret nothing!

Yay nukes! With enough variables, I think I could build one with Katastrophi 3 that can kill an entire city while leaving the buildings intact.

Oh. Not genocide. Forget I said anything. : P. Anyway, yeah. Suddenly, all the princess ants are trying to seduce Ben to sway him onto their side, and assassins strike from every corner!

Oh hey, nukes are on the table again. As long as it's in the real world and not a bardo, everything will be fine! Only a few more days until I can permanently wrap up this garage thread, and then the picnic can begin, and then we can start up the big plots!

I bet more than a few of our episodes are going to begin with someone muttering "...Oh god dammit. Not again." XD

In Fallout you usually start off trying to complete a "quest," like finding an important item or character, but you end up getting involved in all kinds of crazy important stuff. In the latest game you start out looking for the guy who shot you, for example. Then you get involved with a three-way war for the state of Nevada, become the Ciaphas Cain of that war, and have the option to nuke the game's antagonist into the ground.

...We prooobably won't end up going the ol' genocide route, but we will probably end up in the middle of whatever Game of Thrones type BS is going on when we end up tunneling into the kingdom.

That's perfect! Maybe when we invade the place we can find a deserted ICBM launch platform, which we could then augment to use for SPACE ADVENTURES! Or for launching ICBMS. That may come in handy when the Martians invade. Ben could get Skafoi 4 for the teleportation without much trouble: he just has to realized the whole "belief is all that matters" thing, and then do something that (in his mind) justifies his being able to build a teleporter. Because he's meta like that.

"...I'minspace."

And considering that many of the guests will be coming from Sewer Heroes in the first place...

All the drinks!

Quite. Large bardos that are constantly fed by people learning about bugs in school are great. (Still haven't played any of the Fallouts though)

Oh I suppose we could build a ship first. I mean, I guess that way we'd have oxygen while in space, but w/e. We could launch from the Lemurian storehouse of course! It could be our Earth Based base of operations, with a link to the Space Base. The best part of the space base is we don't have to worry about turning out like Nestor.

Spaaaaaaaace.

The overlap between all our shows will probably be one of the Best Things about owning a network. I could see more than a few guests on Boris Talks getting lost on their way out of the studio and accidentally ending up on Sewer Heroes.

Woohoo, soda! :D

Thanks! The majority of the time probably will be spent with the Ants and Bees, though. Maybe we'll have to catch a Spider assassin, though, or we'll get lost and wander into a Mantis village. Looooots of world exploring awesomeness is possible. We could have a whole mini-storyline in the Insect Kingdoms! We could be three Couriers from Fallout: New Vegas, and the bardo would be our Mojave.

If the first step is the boots, I could have Ben build them right after the Triple Thesis Thread. Or maybe I build the ship first, then build the boots while we're already in space? That might be the better idea. We would need a place to launch our first ship from, though. Finding it might be a mini-adventure itself.

Reasons why said plots will be the Best Thing: Space Whales (That's the whole reason. Well, that and Doctor Who references), infiltrating and attacking a Space Nazi base, recreating Deep Impact (and that music video), exploring a dead ship (and possibly repairing it, if we don't end up having to destroy it), and literally fighting off an alien invasion. Possible with the repaired dead ship from earlier.

Space will be awesome.

"Don't forget to tune in tomorrow for Death Race, when our contestants use flaming steaks to burn rubber, and Boris Talks for kendo pointers!"

Psssh, Jack will probably bring it unironically, along with a good number of other soda types.

Those are some pretty sweet civilizations. Obviously the bees and Ants are best developed, but with a plot centered around the Ants in a bardo known for Bees, that's expected.

We need the boots to get to the asteroids to harvest the raw materials to form into the space station, which we use as a base of operations, traveling back and forth on the Drop Pod. Boots, ship, Elevator. All we need is to give it a -3 to handling to make it cost no mania to run, and we've solved 90% of the world's problems right there.

Plots: Space Whales (That's the whole plot), The Space Nazis want to crash the moon into the earth by strapping a rocket to the dark side, An Asteroid is heading toward Russia, A darkened ship drifts near Earth, and of course, Rebelling Martians want to take over the Earth regardless of friendly terms and Commands of non-interference.

"Tonight, on Food Bank: The team answers the question on everyone's mind: if you cook a 20 foot circle of filet mignon using the explosion from Jack's Vodka Launcher, will those steaks get you drunk? And later: robo-chef Boris turns a table full of ingredients into a sushi feast with only his katana! That's tonight, on SCIE(NCE)!"

Hell yes, insane Juggalo ants who want to take over the ant kingdom and begin open war against everyone else! They have their own queen, their own weapons, and enough insane ant soldiers to give the Monarchy reason to worry. But where did the Crazy Rasberry ants come from, anyway? From whence does their mirthful madness spill forth into the world?

SPOILER: [-] A spilled bottle of Faygo. Raspberry flavor, of course. Possibly from our picnic, if one of us brings it ironically.

That would be perfect! Then we'd dig through the wall of a HUGE tunnel, land right next to a HUGE line of forager ants carrying food to one of the queens, and have absolutely no freaking idea where we are.

SPOILER: [-] Mantises; Living in small villages hidden in the tall grass and fog of the east, the Mantises are a calm and quiet people. Theirs is a society of respect and self-worth, where quiet wisdom wins out against loud stupidity and the most powerful leader is the one who speaks the least. While they are welcoming to lost and weary travelers, they detest royal politics and refuse to become involve. More than one pushy diplomatic envoy has returned from a Mantis village with three arms in a sling, the victim of a fighting style so complex and precise that few can even describe it in words.

Toads; Just as birds resemble the mythical dragon, toads seem to almost resemble the manticore. While capable of crushing lesser soldiers beneath their powerful feat and massive girth, the toad is most feared for the lightning-fast pink monster it carries in its mouth. A toad's sticky, nigh-invulnerable tongue can pluck wasps out of thin air and slurp up entire units of army ants at one time, catching and swiftly yanking them to their death inside the toad's stomach. Which, since this is a bardo, is filled with boiling acid.

Huu'mn; Just as the Kingdoms are based on misconceptions humanity once held about insects, the baleful Huu'mn are based on a similar phenomenon. One that might take a little longer than to explain than it would take to explain a Kingdom.

The opinions mortal scientists (who are the source of bardos and manes themselves) hold about the relationship between humanity and the environment are incredibly diverse, and more often than not, conflicting. Some biologists believe humanity should capture endangered animals for breeding, while others believe they would die in captivity. Some believe humanity is at fault for Colony Collapse Disorder, and some believe a naturally occurring pathogen is to blame. This leads the mania currents effecting the Insect Kingdoms to fluxuate wildly as theories on both sides are both proven and disproven, resulting in a mane that echoes that confusion through sheer incomprehensibility. One that no one, including Peers visiting the bardo, can truly understand. The near-Lovecraftian Huu'mn.

Put simply, Huu'mn are disturbingly close to the Old Ones of the Insect Kingdoms. They live on the far, far fringes of world, where few plants can grow and the ground turns to poison. The creatures have bodies like constantly shifting outlines filled with pure maniacal energy, their shapes and motives changing as new theories are put forward and old theories are debunked. Rather than specifically aiding or harming the world in which they live, Huu'mn simply change it. They change it in ways that no mortal man or insect should behold. They are at once both R'hllor and the Great Other, possessing both godlike power and utterly alien morality.

They should be avoided at all costs... if they even exist at all. The Huu'mn are merely a myth to most denizens of the Insect Kingdom; a scary story to keep their children up at night. If only the truth was that simple.

Space rocket boots. My God, that's absolutely amazing. I'm totally having Ben make some of those (possibly for everyone, because I'm about to buy some dots in Assembly Line). I suppose now we can build the space station first, then build the space elevator from the top down using the rocket boots to move around in zero gravity as we're working on it. We're going to have a space station. Yes.

And as long as we're talking about space... Here are some cool images, because plot ideas. Because space plot ideas.

That sounds like some potential programing there. Really, with the Food Bank we have a never-ending supply of rare and expensive ingredients (unless that ends up being its fault) and we can do stuff like throwing truffles into a blender to make milkshakes, seeing what happens when you have a 20 foot circle of meat and flame roast it with a Vodka Launcher, and of course the best event: Sword-point sushi with Boris.

Indeed, I was imagining the Game of Thrones ant kingdom. The insane takeover attempt from the Crazy Rasberry ants? They produced their own queen, and an insane clown posse rampages over the lands. The weaponize food, and go friggin' crazy with the ultraviolence.

And how to enter the Bardo! I'm thinking you have to try and physically dig into an ant's hive, while focusing on what they have done. Like, say, trying to dig down with a mole machine while remembering how they attacked the picnic.

SPOILER: [-] I have absolutely no plans whatsoever when it comes to world-building, until I type it up. Go ahead; I still don't even have anything for beetles or grasshoppers, other than the beetles having herculean strength and a peaceful nature, and the grasshoppers being lazy bards that try to mooch off of the hard-working insects.

Yeah, the old plan involved waiting until Jack had enough XP to buy Skafoi 3, then duel-build space-rocket boots (each boot the worn wonder(Yay Assembly Line)), to get up high enough to build the Space Elevator (on rails=X2 speed modifier) for the eventual creation of a life-supported Space Station.

Maybe SCIE(NCE) could have a cooking show? A cooking show that blends science-y cooking techniques and neverending fondue fountains with actual food bought at actual stores? Like the lovechild of Mythbusters and Epic Meal Time. We experiment with the recipes so you don't have to! ...Or, uhh, maybe so you can experiment with them after we're done. Geniuses like experiments.

Lol, there could be different "branches" of the army ants reporting to different queens! Or maybe it's more of a Game of Thrones kind of scenario, with each queen having her own "loyalist" soldiers and various alliances within the monarchy to bolster her forces. I found a type of ant that fits your earlier idea of an attempted ant takeover, too; behold the Crazy Rasberry ant, currently in the process of invading freakin' Texas.

I love it. If any insects would be the blackest of the black and grey morality, it would be the spiders. That is an insanely awesome writeup though. So awesome. Words can't even describe. I think it goes without saying that man adventures will be had in this glorious world of terrifying giant insects.

SPOILER: [-] I could do the mantises, toads, and humans if you didn't already have plans for them. That way you won't have to do all of the work. :P

Things Jack Has: Life Support Systems, A Gun That Launches Molotovs, Irons In the Fire (All Of Them)

Things Ben has: Prostasia, Skafoi 3, A Burning Desire To Fight Moon Nazis

Things that have to happen: SPOILER: [-] SPAAAAAACE!

Stepping up the timetables, eh? I like this idea. I like this idea a lot.

I call the red suit. Also that food looks delicious, and I may be going to the store to buy a lot of food now.

Well, I wasn't able to find any kind of revolutionary ant, but I was able to find the Fire ants (Arsonists) and the Crazy Ants (Self explanatory). Also, apparently there are multiple queens in a hive, so maybe there are factions in the monarchy, each group of ant having sub-groups that report to particular queens. Army ants are like that! And they probably have the elite squadron of Amazon Ants for when there's something that the legion can't handle.

I just can't see any kind of insect being designated villains; the ants seem like more of an actual society that works hard than anything else. Maybe the spider kingdom though. Those guys, they steal insects from their own homes and liquify their organs, draining them dry and leaving the desiccated husks as a warning to any who would dare go to war with. And now I'm thinking of how each kingdom works...

Spiders; They don't have a King, they don't have a Queen, they don't even have their own lands. What they do have is clans, the family tie. The mother spider, after devouring the father, has millions of spiderlings, who are taught how to hunt and assassinate key insects of the other kingdoms. Over the course of this training, 99% of the child spiders are killed by the obstacles, the prey, and each other, leaving only the most deadly assassin spiders alive, at which point they leave to terrorize their own portion of a kingdom.

Wasps; They live in hives made entirely out of paper money. A society of mercenaries, they are often contracted for close air support or the hunting of Spiders.

Scorpions; Having the lands of the burning sands to the south, the scorpions are known for their implacability. Once a scorpion is fighting, they never stop until their opponent is crushed beneath them. With their meaty claws, hard exoskeleton, size, and poison sting, a single scorpion can take down an entire platoon of army ants. Fortunately, they aren't an expansionistic people, and are mostly content to remain in their territory, save for raids that wipe out entire villages. According to stories, they carve a bloody swath to the well, get a drink, then carve another bloody swath back to their dwellings.

I'll get beetles and grasshoppers later.

... We need to build a space station. I can make life support now. Next month, I can have four of these things.

You have no idea the plans that Alexander and I made while you were gone; so many irons in the fire. We can step up our timetables.

Boris makes everything better! As do tuxedo chocolate fondue fountain flashmobs, of course. Fair warning: we will probably look like thiswhen fondue mode is activated. That is a good thing. The best thing, in fact.

That would be great! A society where, even though you're basically wearing a label on your head with your life's purpose written on it, everybody acts like it isn't there. I wonder if there are revolutionary ants born to shake up the social order and attempt to assassinate the monarchy, but everybody treats them just like normal until they attack. I like the idea of the ant army as an unending wall of Roman soldiers who just never. stop. coming.

I could see the Bees and their domain being the "elite" of the nobody knows how insects work bardo. Maybe the ants are the designated "villains" like the Orcs are in Lord of the Rings, the spiders are the kingdom that everyone is a little scared of (because SPIDERS, man!), beetles are politicians and bureaucrats... Bardo sizes go up to "Earth," so the full bardo itself could be massive. As could the potential for plot.

SPOILER: [-] And somewhere, on the farthest reaches of the bardo, where the sweet, fertile ground turns to death and poison, live the Sapiens.

Oh, Skafoi 3? The spaceship building thing? The thing that Ben has right now?

How can you look for Skafoi 3 plots...

SPOILER: [-] WHEN THEY ARE ALREADY HERE?

We're going to have to plan out fondue outings, and wear tuxes under some regular, tear away clothes. So, driving about, then we roll back the top, activate the fountain, and suddenly tuxedos and dancing. Also, Boris.

Ah yes! Army ants are the military, the harvester ants are the ones that work the fields, carpenters build houses and tunnels, out of wood, Impl-Ants, the demon ants that haunt the nightmares of ant children, weaver ants, and thief ants, they all form a complex society where you are born into your job, but everyone is still surprised when the thief ant steals their sugar. Army ants are totally the Legion though, with shields and swords, that act as an implacable force that you just try not to have facing you. Bees are just the most well know kingdom, because they are the ones most often visited by Genii. After all, they're the center for biological modifications and learning, up in their flower towers above the wars of all the other kindoms.

Ya know, as soon as one of us has Skafoi 3, those plots must exist.

Even better! I'll have Ben carry around a suitcase with a tuxedo in it for just such an occasion. Instant class.

Oh, that would be awesome! The ants could live in a huge system of caves underground, emerging like the earth like insect demons bent on conquering the kingdom and destroying all that stands in their way. Kind of like a Zerg swarm or Tyranid hive fleet, maybe, led by a "queen" that holds a mental link to all of her mindless "drones." There could be other kingdoms beyond the bees, too: spiders as ninja assassins, wasps as feared warriors, scorpions as uncompromising samurai that string themselves to death upon failure... and then there's us, flying above the swarm in a toy helicopter gunship playing teh war musik.

Don't worry, I wouldn't spoil everything like that! :P I'm not lifting plots or enemies from Dead Space, Aliens, or Half Life (although combing those three... possible other cool thread?) so it's not all ruined. Although I will tell you one thing...

SPOILER: [-] ...that I don't plan on spoiling the thread! Muhahaha! You were worried for a second, weren't you?

We can just plug the music into the car's CD slots; no need to put negative modifiers onto the device itself. Advantages to being integrated into a car. : D

There's a bardo somewhat like that; SPOILER: [-] Quote: The Insect Kingdoms: The Insect Kingdoms seem to reflect the various inaccuracies one finds in various media about the actual ways insect societies work, as compared to how they actually do. The most popular and well known among them is the Field of Flowers, reflecting inaccuracies about bees. The inhabitants themselves are pretty much humanoid, but with multi-faceted eyes and antennae. Like normal bees, the Field of Flowers has a queen, but that's where the similarity ends. She doesn't give birth to the populace, but she was a part of a hereditary monarchy,... that was overthrown in a revolution in the past two decades. The queen is still there, but she's now just figurehead, without any power. Now, a council of elite scholars and naturalists rule in their place. There is no biological caste system, but there is strong community bent, and a pressure to conform to societal norms. And the giant flowers, some the size of redwood trees, are everywhere. They are a food source for both beeman and cattle, the former converting it into honey, and the latter, really giant aphids, converting it into milk. A truly astounding variety of flavors and varieties by can be made from the different flowers.

In addition to the giant aphids, various beetles and other insects fill the ecological niche filled by higher earth animals. Bees are mammals here and the size of earth bears, for example. The exception to this are birds, which are huge, and could be compared to dinosaurs or dragons, some types even breathing fire via a gland in their beak.

As for the beemen themselves, as mentioned above, there is no true caste system. When born, all beeman are born physiologically the same, in a roughly equal gender ratio. They will grow, learn and reach adulthood around the age of 20, however they won't reach sexual maturity and fertility without a dose of Royal Jelly, a substance produced by the Ambrosia Makers' guild. Thus birthrates are low and large families are held in high regard, though they are rare.

The secret of making Royal Jelly is an open one. The recipe is common knowledge, but the Ambrosia Makers keep it as their strict purview with laws and steep fines to back this dictum. Due to this, there is a bustling blackmarket trade in Royal Jelly. No reason that those misunderstandings about how ants work (the queen tyrannically leads her people, they desire nothing more than picnic foods, they grow in radioactivity, and can lift thousands of times their weight no matter how big they get) couldn't come out into another kingdom. I can see a plot in which the Ants try to take over the entire Insect Kingdom.

Sounds good to me, at least. More Lab Space is always good. Shhhh! Spoilers.

I like it! Does the fountain play classy music when it rises from the car? Because if not it totally should. :D

Yes! Or a disintegrating explosive weapon mounted on a mole machine. Something like this might actually make a pretty cool bardo. Start with some disproven theories about the effects of radioactivity on insects, a few failed doomsday predictions about ants growing to consume all of humanity, some flavor... giant vengeful ant bardo. They're not just hungry for pie any more.

You knooow, if we did the thread where we raid the old Lemurian storehouse for lab space before this one... there could be a radio/jukebox inside that could pick up the signal. Then at least one of us would hear it and tell the others. Because adventure! Oh, and it actually is a completely legitimate facility. One hundred percent!

Of course, so was the USG Ishimura. And Hadley's Hope. And Black Mesa, at one point...

Since it would be integral to the car, I think it would fold down into a little flat box in the back; then to use it we open up the top, and the fondue fountain rises up with chocolate. Chocolate and truffles. : P I don't think anyone really 'eats' explosions though.

A disintegrating weapon will prove most useful at this point. We cut our way down into their burrows, take the fight to them!

Well, assuming the signal came in while you were at work, or you decide to call in Jack for back-up. It seems like a completely legitimate facility though.

That's actually a really cool idea! :D It would be capable of all different kinds of foods, but would still have the continuous stream of chocolate for snack-dipping goodness. And with Alexander's Metaptropi, we could collapse the thing down to a small briefcase or... another thing about the size of a small briefcase. Our briefcase-related possibilities are unlimited in nature! :P

Hey, if anything could suspend disbelief? It would be chocolate and caviar. Well, maybe that and explosions.

Lol! Highlights could also include Ben trying to barbecue those candy kebabs I linked over an actual fire, Luna cooking (it's basically Epic Meal Time with spray cheese in place of Jack Daniels), and Boris doing Boris things. And the fight against the Unending Hive, of course.

No!! D:

Ben has an Apokalypsi device, though, so we could still pick up the signal. There is hope!

We could probably do the same with the food bank I have now, as long as you put a couple of quotation marks around the word food. See, in the case of the fountain, it would be shaped as a fountain continuously spouting chocolate, and it would have a slot at the bottom from which to speak and gain sustenance. Generally marshmallows, strawberries, pretzel sticks, and other delectables, but fully capable of generating meat, bread, cheese, chips, ice cream, or whatever a person might want to dip into a chocolate fountain. Or gourmet foods, if the person using it suspends their disbelief about a fondue fountain being stocked with caviar.

Yes! It be fixed! Hopefully, shenanigans, involving Gene not eating any of our home-cooked meals, Jim trying to cook the steaks, and how Jack is eating all the food before anyone else can get any. Plan 'add variable 'only against insects' to chainsaw-sword' is a go! We must have vengeance on behalf of the lasagna!

If only Alexander hadn't just destroyed all of Jack's radios. D :

We could sell gourmet food to random people that way! Like a food truck, only not a truck at all. But still food.

Maybe just sticking with the fountain would be better. :P

A bunch of crazy people around a ton of sugar. What could possibly go wrongkatastrofiwaronants?

Out of absolutely nowhere, a radio ad for a beholden rehabilitation center begins to play on all available devices. It promises a caring staff, all sorts of Wondrous amenities, and the chance to have meaning again by taking part in an experiment. Along with the broadcast are directions to the facility, and the vague promise of a reward given to all participants upon completion of the experiment. Then it cuts out again, leaving nothing behind but the soothing tones of Bob Crosby.

Then the fun begins.

And once the Fellowship is a go, he could build a 0 cost car, install the fondue station into it, and that will lower [it's] bound mania by one for falling under the Vertex Devil's purview, and that's a free traveling fondue station right there.

Ah. Well, that should only take a couple of posts; Mars out of office, Jack into office, talk to Ben. Then things happen, I assume.

Nice! It could be like a mobile kitchen, only running on Jetsons "say the name and it appears" tech rather than auto-chefs or something clumsy like that. And then, of course, it unfolds into a fondue fountain. :D

Woo hoo! I love plot progress. :D It would be awesome if Jack could go over the specifics of Ben's job before the thread ends, though. I have something cool planned. >:D

Well... Now that it's March, I have the assembly line merit. I can just make another foodbank, then edit the variables over the next few days, and ask Alexander to add the collapsable variable. (Different fault, Collapsable, only a charge-up time of thirty seconds, no reload)

That would work. : D

Just a few more posts! Jack won't be bringing food from the food bank, so it shouldn't take for friggin' ever to get the thread set up.

Yeeeah! We could even have a literal fondue fountain with some Metaptropi 1, and all the gigantic strawberries/marshmallows/whatevers we can eat! It also allows for some really weird exposition: Ben is really, really afraid of chocolate fondue fountains.

We could use Epikrato! ...Or just suggest a Sci-Fi noise fault when we build the Wonder. Isador's a pretty cool ST, so he might actually do it. :D

...B-but, the garage thread is moving so slowly! I want mah sugars and/or sucrose! D:

Oooo, and if we progress to the point in the Dog thread at which I have a reason to change the Food Bank's fault, we can have a chocolate fondue fountain as well! Muhahaha. Muahahahaahaahah! Ha, fondue is delicious.

I wonder if we can plant the idea in Isador's head somehow...

It's almost the entire reason we have to wait for the Garage thread to finish before I can start up the picnic!

Oh, yes. There will be sucrose. There will be sugar. Muhahaha! Muhahahaha! MUHAHAHAHAHA!

One, that would be the best thing ever and probably invite references to Destroy All Humans!, and two, you have no idea how badly I want to bring that car back somehow. A noise fault would be fantastic.

I'm looking forward to it! It'll probably be hilarious if it happens before the picnic. Everyone'll be on eggshells, making sure to treat him with "respect..."

Sweet! Delicious desserts! So, succulent steaks and sugared sweets, sucrose and sauces. This picnic is going to be the best.

The best case scenario is if the saucer gets a noise-making fault, like your old car had. We could have unlimited steaks, and freak out every farmer in the state.

It's definitely going to be a huge reveal though.

Lol! I don't think that would be a problem. :P His specialty is making really, really sweet desserts, so he'll probably bring some kind of cake or a bunch of milkshakes in a cooler. ...He's got a lot of free time.

I'm pretty sure stealing a cow would be the best thing. We just have to make enough noise so the rancher runs outside and sees us doing it. No real reason why we have to be seen, of course; it's just funnier that way.

It did! Although Alexander didn't ask about Jim's "importance" just yet.

And depending on how the taste test goes, Jack might not bring a lasagna! Or whatever. Ben's cooking must be better than the stuff the Food Bank is producing right now.

Driving down the hiiiiiighway, then going straight up when the police try to blockade the alien space-ship? Also, Alexander has been wanting to steal a cow...

Lol, don't worry. Ben will bring something, not just mooch off of everyone. :P

I guess the only real question is this: what kind of awesome stuff are we going to do with 10 handling dice?? Besides making crop circles, of course.

Sounds like a plan! :D

That would be nice. Fingers crossed! :P

Base 400 MPH safe speed for inspiration 4, -80% speed to bring it down to 80 mph, and +8 handling, Hovering for -2, and why not make it a convertible for another +2. Then -2 to make it costless, Total of 10 handling.

Well, nWOD has them show up, but blurry, but we could blame it on terrible cameras. LOTS of awesome.

Or, if Alexander asks about why Jim was such an important customer, Jack'll explain.

That would be awesome. We could probably dodge ranged projectiles by flipping to the side with that kind of handling bonus! It would give new meaning to the poster Ben might put up in the supply closet, too.

Aaaah, I see. The cameras wouldn't be able to detect Gene, Delanta, and Vincente then, so there wouldn't be any harm in having them as contestants. There would be a lot of awesome, though. :D

Yeah, Ben has absolutely no idea that Jack thinks Jim is in the Mafia. I just thought it was funny. :P To be honest, Ben would probably assume that Jim is in the Mafia too if he saw something like that.

All we need is to use the speed/handling conversion to bring it down to normal highway speeds, and we'll have a saucer that can fly through a crowded shopping mall without hitting anything.

Well, it's not like EVERYTHING we to do has to run on wonders. We can just hook up a regular security system, with mundane cameras, and not bind up all of our mania. (Unless Alex gets up to fellowship 3 in his group, and we install level one Katastrophic weapons, integrated into level one Apokalpysi devices with the stored media variable)

Well, not that Ben can read Jack's internal reasoning and monologs, but he is convinced that Jim is in the Mafia, primarily because of their first meeting, which was full of code words, references to working with the family, and needed Jack to 'do what he did for his aunt', which then turned into 'discrete mechanic' when he tried to not get caught up in it.

Lol, I'm glad it was. Now he's imagining himself as the main character in Hot Fuzz to pass the time.

I bet we could make crop circles if we flew carefully enough. :D

I thought they were only blurry was only on mortal video? I know you can scan them with Apokalpysi 2 devices without difficulty.

Wait a minute... Jim is in the Mafia?? SPOILER: [-] Ben used to be a Mafia enforcer.

Ben's reaction was everything Jack was hoping for, by the way.

Skafoi 2 Ray, integrated into a Skafoi 2 Saucer with the hover variable? Totally doable.

The problem is that Vampires show up blurry on camera. I suppose that could be a low-level prostasia electromagnetic shield going on there, so yeah, that could work.

Everyone knows that the extremists get all the views! I'd name examples, but they're the kind of people that I'm pretty sure go around having their people hack RP private messages looking for people to sue for libel.

Exactly! Ben McCarthy doesn't believe in himself, who believes in the belief. He believes in the belief, which makes him an Ork. An Ork who works as a janitor, apparently. :P

FLYING tow trucks! From Mars! Actually, wait; if we built a flying saucer with a onboard teleportation ray we could just fly over the destroyed cars and beam them back to base for repairs!

That would be hilarious! Although they might use Vampire powers to deal with some of the obstacles, and if they find out we recorded them they'll probably try to kill us and our network. So obviously we... SPOILER: [-] ...would have to tell the cameras that they're Geniuses with a ton of internalized Wonders. What? Did you think I was going to say we couldn't have them on? >:D

Boris Talks sounds like it's going to be awesome. I wonder if we could beat Jay Leno in the ratings? :P

Yah, but if Jack paints it Yellow, he won't HAVE to roll for damage as often. Also, more fire. The problem is that once you know the secret, you have to actually believe in what you're doing having power. Harder than it sounds. (Unless you're believing in the belief itself, which is what you are doing and that entire sentence is worthless)

Suddenly, tow trucks! Tow trucks everywhere!

Maybe we invited them over for the sewer gator's dinner. Seriously though, we were discussing having Gene, Vincete, and Delante being contestants. It would be amazing.

Oh yeah, that's what Boris Talks is all about. The Old Man robot hassling people, talking about communism, and in general talking about cool stuff.

Alexander has posted, and Jack has clarified! Now comes the time when Ben realizes that Mania isn't electricity at all: it's latent Waaagh! energy. That means that you can theoretically build anything if you believe hard enough, and (most importantly) that Geniuses are literally hoomie Mekboyz. And I bet if you painted the launcher blue you would roll more successes. :D

That could also be the most awesome part of the race. We'd probably have to build a special vehicle just to hold them all, then armor it up in case somebody recognizes us and decides to start shooting... It'd be like a weekly gauntlet!

Three cheers for Alex then! SCIE(NCE) is basically the best network name in history ever.

Lol, they'd probably think we invited them over for dinner once they find the obstacle course. Imagine their relief when they realize that it's all a gameshow.

That would be hilarious! And what if we got actual people on his show too? Like Jack, Ben, Luna, Delanta... Boris could interview them too, and they'll probably have no idea what's going on!

As soon as Alexander posts, Jack is going to clarify about the paint. But yeah, just have to get someone to run all the other contestants. One of these days, after the Voices thread wraps up, I'm gonna have to repair the Launcher, then paint it yellow to get more explosive radius. Don't want to have to deal with half-dice, after all.

On their own, the robot mook's cars should actually be a challenge. Anyone who isn't a genius would find them completely unbeatable with the variables that We'd be giving them, and the skills given to them by Automata points, even in a Skafoi vehicle. Fortunately, we have mania, and weaponry. Twisted wreckages will litter multiple realities. Getting them back to rebuild for the next week could be the most difficult part of the entire race.

Yeah, that was All Alex's idea. I just came up with the words for the first few letters.

Why yes. Some of them might actually be people that we invited over for dinner, who accidentally took a wrong turn. (The hologram projectors misleading people probably wouldn't help) Oh yes, he could interview the zombie intelligences: "So, would you say that Vanatis only edged you and your partner out because of that cheap shot with the chainsaw cutting your cars in half from behind?" "..." "You heard it here folks, the common man is enraged at the ways the proletariat keeps them down."

Weekly DeathRaces across several different worlds and realities, more than half of which don't exist. And ending with a jump that will probably leave us in midair for minutes. Yup, sounds awesome to me!

I like the parentheses. So professional!

Lol! That's going to be great. Wouldn't half the "contestants" on Sewer Heroes just want to know what the hell is going on, though? A crazy robot would only add to the weirdness. Which is exactly why Boris has to be the interviewer. And the race commentator. And the talk show host, which will probably be extra hilarious. Maybe he could have a live studio audience of the lucky robots who didn't explode in DeathRace?

Well, as soon as we have a ST who isn't sick or busy with five other threads, The Race is good to go; Variable wrangling doesn't take that long, and I already have a car.

And if possible, it would be one of the weekly broadcasts!

SCIE(NCE), as the thing that goes up on the screen. We've also decided that Boris will be the guy who talks to the audience; the announcer guy and commentator for during the races, the interviewer of successful (or failed) Sewer Heroes, and he has his own late-night talk show!

Again, this race is going to rock. Last minute repairs, sword oaths of vengeance, bloody debts repaid at just under the speed of sound... And then there's Ben dressed as the Stig, silently judging anyone who moves to overtake Jack. If they try it anyway... Well, that's what the machine guns are for. :P

That might just be the Most Epic Thing In The History Of Forever. We'd be dodging Hollow Earth nazis, evading Party secret police in the grey plains of despair, probably getting lost in the maze and nearly running down a few Wannabe Sewer Heroes... And it's all broadcast on live TV. Amazing. 8-)

...The SCIENCE channel. It's perfect. This is now officially the Best Subplot Ever (r).

And that's the other reason Jack needs passengers; to keep an eye on the car while everyone is doing the sabotage game. A minute before the race actually starts, the saboteurs go back to their vehicles and confer with their cohorts about who might have messed with their ride, try to fix whatever they did, and mark them out for furious vengeance during the race.

Through the Sewers, the Labyrinth, the Endless Plains of Despair bardo, all around the hollow Earth's outside, and then a final flight over a random canyon. Sounds like fun to me! Well, they shouldn't have tried to break into our lab the day we scheduled our race.

Oh, Alex and I brainstormed a bit. We came up with the Scientific Channel for Intelligent Entertainment (New Content Everyday).

That is a good point. We might end up sabotaged too if we aren't careful! It's like the Vertex Devils are really a more grimdark Wacky Races, and literally everyone is Dick Dastardly. Cheating, shortcut-ing, and evil laughter everywhere. It's going to rock.

Awesome! We could probably hold races in/through bardos too if we feel adventurous (feel like taking over the Nürburgring for a night?), and if we're really evil we could do a DeathRace/Sewer Hero crossover. Imagine some wannabee secret agent trying to dodge all the crazy obstacles we set up AND our cars/robot armies.

Woohoo, live TV! All the pros hack abandoned broadcasting towers to beam their insanity out to the masses! I'm starting to see a (the) bright (ist) future for our TV Station... whatever we decide to call it. :P

As Alexander mentioned when we started talking about this race, there's probably going to be a BUNCH of genii who realized that the pursuit rules could get insane when you use variables. Of course, those are the guys that Jack tries to sabotage. Taking the -6 penalty to do it in one round, Jack could try to just modify variables in random cars, giving them the SLOW ACCELERATION variable. (Suddenly, they handle Much Better)

Well, this overlaps with the security video idea. We'd be putting cameras in the underground tunnel system to keep track of the 'heroes' as they go through their obstacles, and one of them is an enormous labyrinth cube, with sloped walls. The route could change every race, and require split second timing to go the right way each time. (adding clinging to all the cars might make it a whole lot cooler, if we make the tunnels circular)

Live broadcasts! We also looked at the broadcasting stations description in the Apokalypsi section; we might just make an entire station. "Boris Talks", "DeathRace", and "Sewer Hero" should be enough to cover all our broadcasting bases, and then we start selling ad space. After all, the towers in Atlanta should all be abandoned, and we'd have a monopoly on auto-hacking broadcasting technology.

Lol, so Jack is going to leave absolutely everybody in the dust then, basically. There'll probably be at least one driver who catches him, though, and that's where the onboard weaponry comes in.

Good point. And it is going to have to be huge, isn't it?? Where are we going to put it, anyway? Underground somewhere, or maybe on a massive floating platform in the middle of the ocean?

Now that's best idea! Then races become tense struggles for glory as we're blowing up robots left and right, Alexander is commanding his army like mission control, and Geniuses worldwide are shouting at their TVs. Probably with two-way Apokalypsi, too. So get ready for a lot of yelling! XD

Indeed. So far the plan starts at sabotaging the best looking cars with dismantle technology before the race, using the Vehicle Persuit rules to be just plain better at racing than most other cars SPOILER: [-] The relative speed of vehicles is also a factor in determining who is likely to get away or be caught. An 18- wheeler isn't likely to catch a sports car, for example, but a sports car could probably catch an 18-wheeler. For every three points of difference between competitors' Acceleration traits, the faster one gets a +1 bonus on pursuit rolls. Remainders are rounded down. So, if a pursuer has an Acceleration of 22 and a quarry has an Acceleration of 13, rolls made for the pursuer get a +3 bonus. If a pursuer has an Acceleration of 15 and a quarry has an Acceleration of 13, neither party gets a bonus (the difference between Acceleration traits is less than three and is rounded down). by using the two point Extreme Acceleration variable, and taking out anyone who gets close with Weaponry.

Yes, but you also have to consider the speeds that these races will be going at. When you're going at over 400 mph, that's over 600 yards per combat round. Also, the track is going to need to be really big.

Best idea. We can throw that in between the Picnic and the Bar, maybe. Maybe we could have the robot's split into teams. Like, Team Jack, Team Ben, Team Alex; that way we can keep the rivalries up during the non-actual matches. I'm thinking that Alex's TEAM is actually better than the teams of either of ours, in that his Robot drivers are just plain better, maybe there's more of them. So in the off season, Alex is actually the guy with the huge advantage in points, and we end up racing his robot army as one of those WWE plotline things you were mentioning earlier.

I believe that you will enjoy it when Jack talks about how he gets his car to go fast. I will be requiring that Ben start the topic there, though.

Emperor almighty, tire explosions at 400+ MPH. That's going to be both awesome and horrifying!

I think Ben would be the kind of guy to happily drive around with a size 4 Tesla Coil on the back of his car. 50-100 yards is more than enough considering the size of most raceways, too. I could practically be sniping AI bots from across the track with that thing! XD

Hmm... Oh, wait! What if Jack and Ben taught Alexander how to drive? That could help justify the Stunt Driver merit for Jack, more dots in drive for Alexander, and a Drive specialty (Wondrous cars) for Ben. Plus we get a new thread, and probably some comedy out of it. Everybody wins! I could see our cars having small differences, though. Maybe Alex's car has the best handling, Jack's has the most raw power, Ben's has the most science-y junk (like the aforementioned Sniper Coil), etc. If we built versatile and challenging enough tracks (with tight corners for Alex, straightaways for Jack, that kind of stuff) we could have a good range of balance between the three of us.

Yeah, called shots to the tire probably [are] more effective than trying to get through two durability.

It would have to be a relatively small explosive radius; bringing it down to melee range could make it mania-less, and the knockdown will bring the effective range to twenty yards, unless we make it big. Like, if it's size four, the thing can have a fifty yard range, or 100 yards if it's size 6. Oh, wait, it would also be integral to the car, so there's another +1, and syllabus 2 would give it an extra core modifier.

Gift certificates to Olive Garden. : P

Serious answer: a lot of Vertex Devils would have shot up tires and gas tanks that day. Oh, and also victory! Silly answer: this, but with Ben in place of Mr. T.

Eeh, Ben only has 3 drive too. I do like the idea of short out people's engines with a tesla coil, though! Like, just Tesla Coils in general are cool. One that actually does something would be cooler.

Lol, that's great! Geniuses would actually watch that, too. What would we be giving away for prizes? Fame? Precious Gems? All the riches in Scotland?

I seem to remember that your machine gun's fault could be dramatically reduced by firing them in a moving vehicle. I wonder what would happen if I were to roll down the hood.

Well, not realistic, per say, but more dramatic surely. Lasers are for blowing things up, the Coil is for killing the engines. Now, I still don't know what Alex's theme would be, but considering his relatively low drive skill he'd probably be a dark horse wild-card anyway.

[Sewer Hero] basically boils down to an obstacle course for would-be heroes set on breaking into the evil layer (hologram) through a vast array of automated death traps, eventually leading into a labyrinth, then the sewers, at which point they have to dive down into a hidden tunnel to get to the end. There, they find their prize, and we have Apoklipsi recordings of the entire debacle.

I hope so too! I really think it's going to be awesome, and... well, Ben is a pretty good shot. *cough cough against other cars cough*

I hadn't thought of ejection seats! They would work too. My thought for the Tesla coil was that electricity would arc onto nearby cars and short them out or blow them up, but making it more realistic rather than just a lightning gun would be cool too. 8-)

I think cheap car challenges (since Geniuses can keep anything running) and the occasional special (because we actually could modify our cars to ford a river, cross a desert, etc.) would make cool mini-segments to whatever TV show we're producing. Heck, if almost all of our content is car based anyway, we pretty much already would be the Genius version of Top Gear! :-D

Indeed. Hopefully that can occur immediately after the thesis, since the race will get at LEAST three XP. I'm thinking that for that particular race, I'm gonna need the stunt driver Merit, or a passenger to shoot the other cars. It didn't say anything about winning the race fairly!

Just random ejection seats on our cars. I can see using a bunch of integral lasers to take down the bots with a single shot. Fragile makes it ALL possible. The Tesla coils; that could be tricky. Maybe just a knockback variable with explosive radius, and giving all the cars that aren't yours a bumper made of the material it affects? That sounds plausible.

Awesome! I guess Jack winning the race joining the Vertex Devils can't come soon enough. :D Ben would probably want mostly "science!" themed weaponry, like lasers, rear-mounted tesla coils, that kind of thing. Although we might want to use the "only against certain materials" variable to make the weapons only affect the cars, not actually us. That way we can wear Prostasia armor and shoot with relative impunity! (I could actually see us making some money out of this. :D)

This is a random idea I just had. We are three Geniuses with very distinct personalities. We know a lot about cars. We are, at some point, going to have a car-based TV program. We have a tendency to get into shenanigans. It would probably be pretty funny to see us try to complete various challenges, race eachother in crappy cars, and just generally screw around.

SPOILER: [-] TONIGHT: Jack runs over a shrubbery, Alex builds a better Sandero, and I ride... on a train!

And the cars that we drive could be the heavily modified kind, each with their own themes. Since with Fellowship 2 any Katasrophi weaponry I integrate into the cars is reduced by one bound mania, Jack could implement the ideas from the race into each one with no additional cost. He'd have to talk about what Alex and Ben would want for thematic weapons, but then variables will make allllllll the difference. (The idea is to justify more resource dots in this thread : V)

That might pull in even more ad revenue and crazy ratings, if. You think about it! It'd basically become a race between Jack, Alex, and Ben, with the robots serving as obstacles and things to blow up dramatically rather than actual competitors. We could market merchandise for each team, build custom cars, play off of fan rivalries... Dear Jegus, we could steal ratings from the WWE if we played our cards right!

Indeed. As such, I need to get up in the Vertex Devil's Fellowship double time, so those cars bind 0 mania. We could even actually compete in the races, with the robot mooks serving as obstacles as the real competitors use maniacal boosters and doom-weaponry to cause mayhem and reach for first, and FAME.

Hopy shit, fixed robot Nascar races directed by Micheal Bay and broadcast on live TV. Atlanta needs this. Needs it.

The goal is to have the Picnic thread, then immediately chronologically after that the thesis thread, then Bar-Hopping, all over the place. Everyone brings their non-lethal wonders, enough money for bail, and hopefully remembers the way back to wherever it is they live.

Found it! Just had to CRTL+F for Nascar. Direct conversation in spoiler: SPOILER: [-] Jack Vanatis wrote: Also, back to the crazyish idea; Stacking a race with Mania-free cars driven by a bunch of mass-produced (assembly line) automatons with the drive skill. Wouldn't need to spend all those bonuses on resilience, and we could rig races and bet on the winner every time, while setting up crashes and exciting things due to the expendability of each car and robot pair, taking Nascar by storm and making tons of money. Fragile, plus high speed high stakes driving at over five hundred miles per hour? Move over, Michael Bay.

Alexander wrote: That's not a crazy idea at all! Well, it is, but it's a possible crazy idea! Hell, if you set up your own NASCAR substitute with robots driving the cars and let other people bet on the winners too, you could skim a little money off the top (Jim could probably help with this) and have created an entirely new spectator sport! Deathracing: it's like horse racing, only with cars. Sometimes the cars exploooode!!

Jack wrote: You never see horses explooode!

Alternatively, "Nascar fans, we have one question for you guys. EXPLOSIONS!?!?!?"

Alexander wrote: The "YEEEEEAAAAAHHHH!!!" you'd get in return would be louder than an actual stockcar race.

. . .This might just be me, but I think that "rigged robot NASCAR horserace directed by Micheal Bay" verges on "crazy enough to work," or at least "crazy enough to work for a while and end on a high note rather than a FBI raid."